Bridezillas: Don’t Go There

Bridezilla
Yay! It’s that time of the year! The marrying time. Brides are stressed out, and often misfocused (yes, I made up the word). The economy is shot, but folks still wanna have the “dream” wedding, even if it means nightmares for all those involved. Don’t go there.

• Most people are more than willing to do more than necessary, when you’re civil, considerate and respectful. Act like a demon-possessed banshee if you wanna, and some folks will smile at you, while your head is spinning and green stuff is coming from your mouth — and you STILL won’t get what you want. What a waste of energy. Unless you’re a gazillionaire, NO AMOUNT OF MONEY will be worth the stress of working with you. Expect good customer service.  Be firm, when you need to be. But remember, nice brides (and nice people in general) get more goodies.




• Don’t waste folk’s time. Time is money. I know you think trying on dresses (with eight of your best friends) is the most fun thing in the world, but if you’re not ready to buy a dress (or even engaged, or don’t have a boyfriend, let alone a fiance…), don’t waste my time. I make money when I sell. Spending two hours with you, only to discover that your aunt is making your dress, or you can’t afford the dresses I sell, takes me away from the brides who are ready to buy. There’s no other way to say it.  If you’re in commission sales, you understand what I’m talking about. I love you, but I have to eat…and live…and pay bills. Be respectful of everyone’s time. If you can’t keep an appointment, call and cancel.




• Folks love to lament about how customer service is almost non-existent. But there’s another side to it, and with brides, it’s a side seen way too often. I had a bride, who asked me to have a dress sent directly from a designer, for her to try on. I went thru a lot to get the dress, and I explained to her that it was going to be difficult to get the dress, because it was a new design and wasn’t in stores yet. I wanted to make SURE she wanted to see the gown. After I pulled many strings to get the gown in, she didn’t return my calls — neither did her mom. Now, a simple, “Thanks, but I’m no longer interested” would have been the considerate thing to do. It’s like folks just don’t…care. But if a vendor falls short, in any way, it’s like all hell breaks loose. Treat folks with the same respect you desire.




• Don’t walk in a bridal salon, and talk negatively about the dresses. ”These gowns are UGLY and overpriced!” isn’t something that you (or your mean-muggin’ friends) need to be declaring within earshot of me and my fellow consultants.  If you don’t like what you see, then leave. Quietly.




• When you go on The Knot, to badmouth a vendor, be careful and make sure you give all the details — not just your side of the story, which is often not 100% truthful. A lot of us (in the wedding business) know each other, and we know who YOU are (because we recognize your picture, screename, the situation you wrote about online, or whatever).  Sometimes, it’s best to sit down with a cup of tea…and relax.
  

  On the flipside, don’t read every complaint by disgruntled brides as if it’s the total truth. Too often, it’s very one-sided.  The ”it’s all about me!” brides leave out key details, so they will look like mistreated victims, and the vendors like the devil. Do some research, and talk to some folks, before you write off a prospective vendor. Some “knotties” are “knutties”.

A wedding SHOULD be about two people, celebrating a decision to spend their lives together.  The wedding is not the most important thing in the world — sorry if folks don’t wanna here that, but some couples aren’t making it to the final destination (the altar), because the wedding is way too important. I’m not a psychologist (by profession), but I often wonder about women, who are SO emotionally invested in a…wedding. How a woman behaves, during the planning of her wedding, says a lot about her character and level of mental  health. A woman doesn’t just turn into a “bridezilla”. The tendencies were there, all along. Nice people make nice brides.

A Nappy Girl

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